Today is my birthday! Not only my birthday but my golden birthday! For those who aren’t familiar with golden birthdays (I wasn’t until last year when my mother in law informed me) it is when your age and the numerical date of your birthday match. So in my case I’m 28 on the 28th! Today is also much more significant to me than just my golden birthday, though I feel it’s very sychronistic that my golden birthday falls on the day I celebrate a decade of freedom. You see, I could be celebrating that I’ve been an adult for 10 years, paid bills for 10 years, lived on my own for 10 years, but one of my greatest accomplishments was so much bigger than any and all of that. And I’m not sure paying bills and adulting for 10 years necessarily draws one to celebrate anyhow. Maybe?!
18 always signified freedom to me probably like it does to many of us during our angsty adolescence. I dreamt about a world I didn’t know yet, one filled with adventure, big skies, open land, and security. On my 18th birthday I made one of the most life altering decisions to date. With no plan and no idea what I was going to do (or where I would go) I realized I had the freedom to make a choice, one that seemed out of reach before April 28, 2008. So I left home. I cancelled my subscription to misery because I finally could. The decision to leave behind 10 years of abuse arrived quickly but after what felt like eternity.
And in the 10 years since I’ve been free I’ve done a lot of healing. I’ve cultivated self-love and my own internal voice, I’ve found a confidence I had never fathomed. I’ve moved through fear and heaps of self-doubt. I’ve started a business with my husband, created a blog, travelled throughout the U.S. and so much more that at one time felt like a fantasy. I’ve climbed mountains physically and psychologically nurturing the security I longed for within myself. The trail at times was narrow, edgy, dark, and overwhelming but it led to beautiful vistas of understanding and self discovery. I share this because I believe vulnerability connects us in the human experience and in solidarity with anyone who feels alone, lost, and challenged by life’s difficult paths. The view on the other side is worth the climb to get there.
Thanks for reading and thank you for joining me here
Until next time,